Thursday, 11 October 2007

A Techies Lot Is Not An 'Appy One

When a user's not engaged in his employment (his employment)
He likes to go a browsing on the net (on the net)
Downloading lots of things for his enjoyment (his enjoyment)
I wonder just which viruses he'll get (bugs he'll get)
He calls to say his PC keeps on freezing (keeps on freezing)
And swears it isn't anything he's done (thing he's done)
The excuses they will use beyond believing (beyond believing)
No, a techie's lot is not a happy one (Aaaaah)
With virus-cleaning duties to be done, to be done
No, a techie's lot is not a happy one (happy one)

When a user calls to say their PC's broken (PC's broken)
The screen is black 'cause there's a power cut (power cut)
You know they're much too thick to own a 'puter (a computer)
It's very hard to keep your mouth tight shut (keep it shut)
When a user says she's got a broken cup-tray (broken cup-tray)
It turns out that she means the CD-ROM (CD-ROM)
And they think their PC's so ****ed up they (so ****ed up they)
Know a techie's lot is not a happy one (Aaaaah)
With technical supporting to be done, to be done
No, a techie's lot is not a happy one (happy one)

When the phone rings for an element'ry blunder ('ment'ry blunder)
When the problem that's described is quite absurd (quite absurd)
And it's happened twice before - so it's no wonder (it's no wonder)
That "USER" is a bad four-letter word (letter word)
And the error's nowhere near what they're reporting (they're reporting)
It makes you wish you're carrying a gun (-ing a gun)
And to all the idiots that we're supporting (we're supporting):
A techie's lot is not a happy one (Aaaaah)
With user-interfacing to be done, to be done
No, a techie's lot is not a happy one (happy one)

With apologies to the legendary Gilbert & Sullivan's When a Fellon's Not Engage (or A Policeman's Lot) from The Pirates of Penzance.

I am greatly indebted to Phil Alexander for this brilliant parody! (this is only one of around 700 parodies written by Phil)

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